Gender Outlaw

FTM Transition Blog

My Physical Evolution on Testosterone

First Year on Testosterone

April 1, 2008
3 Months
June 30, 2008
4 Months
July 30, 2008
5 Months
Sept 4, 2008
6 Months
Oct 3, 2008
7 Months
Nov 3, 2008
8 Months
Dec 11, 2008
9 Months
Jan 12, 2009
10 Months
Feb 10, 2009

Second Year on Testosterone

15 Months
July 3, 2009
16 Months
Aug 5, 2009
17 Months
Sept 2, 2009
18 Months
Oct 5, 2009
20 Months
Dec 15, 2009
22 Months
Feb 4, 2010
24 Months
Mar 31, 2010

Third Year on Testosterone

26.5 Months
June 9, 2010
5_torso_26-5m 6_legs_26-5m
30 Months
Sept 19, 2010
5_2yrs5-5mos 6_2yrs5-5mos
33 Months
Jan 2, 2011
3 years, 4 months
Aug 2, 2011

Four Years and Beyond…

4 years, April 2, 2012
4 years, 2+ months – June 12, 2012
5 years, 3 weeks, 2 days – April 29, 2013 5years_4_torso 5years_5_legs
7 years – April 2, 2015 7yrs_4 7yrs_5

Inspired by Ethan’s Photo Documentation.

55 thoughts on “My Physical Evolution on Testosterone

  1. I’m curious, what kind of exercise and diet routine were you following during those two years? I’m wondering how much of it is just the testosterone and how much life style plays into it. Hope to hear from you.

  2. I work out, but not loads. I’d like to do more, I want a bigger upper body, but I need to do the work. I’ve really slacked off in the past 6 months (car accident, then boat loads of stress.) I like crunches (2 sets of 200), push-ups (3 sets of 30-50), chin-ups (3 sets of 10)… lifting your own body weight is a great workout. Bicep curls, shoulder press, chest press with barbells. My dog had a stroke last month, but before that I was walking 5km a day for cardio. Walking is great cardio. I watch what I eat: almost no sugar, no fast food, no corner store snacks, LOTS of protein from multiple sources (hemp rules!) In my experience, T makes building muscle easier, but you still have to do the work. If a guy is on T, but doesn’t exercise and eats like crap, he won’t build muscle and get fit. Hope that helps!

    1. Thanks! Me too! If I could do it all over again, I’d take a photo every day, then make a flip book! (Seriously, I think someone else could run with that idea and get it published…) ps. Subbed to your blog!

  3. I am a phd/professor and one of my areas of study is gender and how it is a social construct. I am amazed at your physical transformation! Honestly, I would not be able to tell from looking at you…I am floored! Did you have top surgery or is that purely from T?

    1. Thank you for your comments! Yes, I had top surgery between the first and second sets of photos. I had a revision to that surgery, as well as a hysterectomy, between the 10 months and 15 months photos.

  4. you look amazing! thanks for sharing your transition photos. i’m pre-everything and just coming out now so it’s really great to find someone who has navigated this journey rather successfully. i am simply amazed at the changes in your upper body especially over the first year… amazing what a year on T can do. i’m so intrigued about it, lol.

  5. what a cool photo essay, showing what has, and has not, changed about you (for example, your smile is the same, and suits you very well). Transition suits you, looks good on you, thanks for sharing.

    1. Thanks, Chris! It’s fun for me to look at, not just for the “flipbook” quality of seeing changes “sped up” over time, but also to remind myself of how far I’ve come. That first year was awkward, you can see it in my face. Around months 15-17 my confidence increased. I need to update this, not just for the historical value, but because it also keeps me honest and set on my fitness goals.

  6. Thanks for the photos. I have been on and off the fence lately about going on T. I don’t know I know what the cost is and all that and I know I would have to really work for it. I’ve been like what if doesn’t work and all that stuff and just seeing the photos really helped out a lot. Right now I’m just sort of in this place where I look all wacky and gender incongruous. And I just by the time I go to the end of the photos I’m like wow! I could actually just look like me I am inside and just be me and “normal.”

    1. Much of your comment resonates with me, JJ. I really worried about T possibly not working for me, and the first year on T was incredibly awkward—I really disliked being “in between” genders. But it’s worked out well for me, and YES I finally feel normal. I look back on older photos of myself and can just see how awkward I looked and felt, and I know I made the right choice. As for cost, T isn’t too expensive. I have zero coverage and pay about $80 every 5 months.

  7. hi joshua your transtion is so impressive and i know lots of hard work would have gone into that, i went to my dr to enquire about DHT he don’t think its even availbale in my country, where i am there is very little awareness in fact i am his first patient and to be honest he treats me but i don’t believe he really understands this like really understand it, its a lonely road there is not many like me here that i know of, i long to know more brothers to talk with share info, i congratulate you on the great job you doing for us who needs info thanks so much, and do you know of any way i can get DHT like can i order it from another country? thanks bro hope to hear from you soon.


    1. Thanks for your comments, Chris! Yes, DHT is difficult to source these days. Your best bet might be to order Andractim gel online. Keep in mind that it *may* be illegal to import it to your country. I’ve never heard of anyone having trouble but I imagine it carries some risk. Andractim is 2.5% DHT, so not as strong as a compounded cream (10%) but I know guys who have had success with it. The hoops we have to jump! Good luck!!

  8. and another thing i was so impressed with how narrow your hips are, this has been a real sore point with me as i had wide hips to begin with, the T has done some slimming but its still far from what i hope for is there anything more i can do to help it out and did you start off with narrow hips or did you work out alot?

    1. The skeletal structure of my hips has always been narrow. If I have extra weight, I carry it at the top of my hip bones, a traditional tire ’round the waist, and that will make my body shape more feminine if left unchecked. Without a doubt, keeping body fat percentage low goes a long way to obtaining a masculine physique.

  9. It’s like getting to watch your real puberty in pictures! And I seriously think you could win a beard-off in Stormalong with the mountain man look. Totally awesome! Thanks for sharing!

  10. What a remarkable journey. I appreciate the work you’ve put into documenting your story. Sharing with us it is a gift. Thank you.

  11. Wow! It’s amazing! Sincerely, I understand and respect as the first, but at the same time i’m feeling a little weird with you. it’s a ¿social? problem and you’re helping to normalize my mind. Thanks for share!

  12. I’d like to make a question if you don’t care. Does your GF still feel the same kind of sexual attraction to you? (Now that you totally look like a man)
    Thanks and congrats, i think you have worked hard and bravely

  13. Apparently you started to have some recesion on your front line hair. Looks like male AGA (men’s typical Genetic Hair loss). Do you know if it could be related to testosterone?

  14. I have been encouraging one of my best friends who I’ve known for 2+ decades (since our 20s) first to look into and lately to follow through with this phase of transitioning, and I’ll be sure to show him this page. Thanks for the pictures of progression!

  15. I am 15 and I am transgender FTM, i really want to start on T as soon as possible, if i could i would do it right now but they say you can’t do it unless you’re 16? is that true??

    1. I could be wrong, but I don’t think there’s a set age for when you can start T. I think it’s done more on a case-by-case basis. If you had access to knowledgeable medical professionals who have experience working with trans teens, you might be able to start sooner. Of course, docs will require that you work with a gender therapist first and that takes time. If you haven’t already, get the ball rolling on that and you’ll soon be on your way.

  16. I randomly found your blog while researching genetics in respect to the Nature/Nurture argument & just wanted to tell you that I am COMPLETELY floored by how brave and inspiring you are & your story is. The level of dedication, courage and commitment your efforts must have taken is just such an incredible thing that I am sure very few can even conceive of being capable of – and yours is definitely a journey that these things look to have very much paid off and your transition well worth it (at least to an outside source!). As a predominantly straight female, I would have so so many questions about your transition, but also being a predominantly straight female, I would not want to inadvertently overstep anything that I do not understand so I am looking forward to continuing to read your blog. Regardless, I very much hope that you have found the answers & happiness in being able to finally express who you are, and I wish you the very best of luck in all of your endeavors. 🙂

  17. Your amazing I’m a trangsguy I would like to no how many doses u use in a month and and the injection name please help me

  18. Did you work out pre t or was working out a ‘new’ habit that you formed on t? I’ve tried to work out and get some more meat on my bones, but I can never bring myself to do it.

    1. I’ve been working out on and off for a little more than 20 years. While I’m an active person, I still have to push myself to be consistent and focused when it comes to working out. And I really only do enough to maintain–I’m not a bodybuilder by any means. My motivation is primarily that if I don’t do it, I will put a little too much meat on my bones, and I’m happier and healthier without it. Everyone has different motivations, so perhaps you just need to figure out more clearly what your motivation is and what it means to you.

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